Posted by: bluewave22 | December 11, 2008


bluewavepostAfter reading penelopefly’s last post, I’m reevaluating my post. The “c word” really puts things in perspective. I too have a big grey cloud hanging over me.

Late next month, I have a hysterectomy+ scheduled. I feel totally healthy in spite of a chronic cough that has essentially blown a few gaskets that need to be repaired. I know I don’t want to have any more children, but I’m still having a hard time with this.

I had this surgery scheduled for April, then October, now January. I’ve always found a reason to postpone. Even with all the emotions that come with a hysterectomy, I was antsy to get meaningful, part time job. I was worried though, that if I were to take a job right now, I would forever be thought of as, “the sickly one.” On reevaluating this, I don’t care. A job can wait. If someone wants to think me sickly, that’s okay too. I will spend time with my kids during winter break without feeling guilty. I am scheduled to volunteer for the Special Olympics in February and can focus on being healed enough to do that.

I know there will be a day when I can really work toward my goals, once I figure out what, exactly, they are. Until then, I’m going to try to relax and cherish these last few weeks with my uterus, to thank it for carrying my two beautiful children.



  1. Beautiful. Cherish, cherish, cherish.

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